Don't Leave The Window Open
by Jawshy
Summary: Alfred decided it'd be a great idea to throw a 'I survived the war' party, little did he know of the secret about to be revealed between two German brothers, and wait, who the hell invited Ivan's crazy little sister! Also includes a very competitive Switzerland and Finland. Rated T for suggestive themes of incest, sexual intercourse and others. (Basically, to be on the safe side.)


Above the door stood a huge banner with the words, "I survived the war!" written in huge, bold letters. Any normal person would have thought you'd be crazy to throw a party for such a strange event, but Alfred F. Jones didn't exactly care much for the reasons of throwing his parties. He'd been back for two weeks, yeah, but he had been away from the country for 5 years, so it's no surprise that he'd throw such a 'ridiculous' party.

The decorations were too cliché, and whoever decided to put bright balloons up really needed to be shot (in the opinion of Arthur Kirkland). Chilling winds were blocked out from the bubbly atmosphere trapped inside of the house; winter was not the ideal time for an outdoor party, so Alfred did make the right choice in keeping everything indoors.

"I was so shocked to hear you almost died out there. I didn't know you were on the frontline?" Francis Bonnefroy piped up a conversation with the American host, his hair was in a ponytail and it was clear he picked out an elegant suit for such an occasion.

"I wasn't on the frontline, dude! That's the thing!" Alfred started, his booming voice filling the room immediately, "People think you have to be on the frontline to die, but you don't! There are attackers everywhere."

His 'friend', Natalia snarled slightly, "I know a man who looked exactly like you, frog. Brushed his hair everyday and kept up his appearance."

Francis' pupils dilated slightly at the sudden reference to himself.

"Such a pity he died trying to fix a tank out there. My years out there were just as worse as Alfred's. Want to know how he died? A bullet straight through his chest, imagine that, franceypants." She growled again, and dragged Alfred away from Francis.

"You could be that guy, dude!" Alfred shouted back as his full body was dragged into the other room.

Arthur, who was also standing next to Francis, turned to him and spoke up for the first time, "Well, may as well get some port. You know, since we're dying anyway."

Francis grimaced and they moved onto the next room, where drinks were being served by the bartender.

* * *

Behind them, where the front door was situated, Ludwig and Gilbert Beilschmidt snuck in, looking as if they'd just robbed a bank.

"Now, remember," Ludwig started, "We are not a couple." His heavy accent tried to stay hushed, but if anyone was within 5 feet of the two, they'd be able to pick out clearly what he said.

"I know." Gilbert sighed, "We're on a covert gay mission." His voice dripped with sarcasm, as he clearly hated the idea of keeping his relationship with Ludwig, also known as his bruder, a secret.

They walked in silence for a few seconds before Ludwig spoke up again, "I'm sorry. I just don't want people to think we are together, it'll blow their minds, Gilbert."

"Oh please," He rolled his eyes, "You ran around naked with Francis at Oktoberfest claiming you were trying to 'feel the breeze' and you think this will blow their minds, bruder?"

Ludwig blushed slightly remembering the event vividly; he was intoxicated when that happened, so he tried to blame it on the alcohol. He glared slightly and they both turned around to be greeted by local Spaniard, Antonio.

"Hola caballeros!~" Antonio greeted them with a wide set smile.

"Ja, hallo Toni!" Gilbert smiled and shook his hand, Ludwig nodded and didn't say much, since he wasn't all that used to his older brother's friends.

"Best war party ever!" The Spaniard announced and grinned, earning a chuckle off Gilbert and a smile off Ludwig.

"Um, I was talking to Lovina's twin sister, and you," He pointed at Ludwig, "made quite the impression on her!"

"U-uh, me?!" Ludwig blurted out, flustered.

"Si, si! She begged me to introduce you!~" He looked over at Gilbert a bit suspicious of the potentiality of Gilbert and Ludwig's 'brotherly bonds', "D-do you mind?"

Gilbert hesitated, but he remembered what Ludwig said, "Why would I? He's my little bruder, I'd want him to get some action!" He nudged Ludwig's shoulder and winked, and Ludwig sent out a nervous smile back.

Antonio grabbed Ludwig's arm and dragged him to the other side of the room, leaving Gilbert to watch in amusement.

* * *

Meanwhile, behind the scene, Tino Väinämöinen was selling none other than a chocolate bar for his adoptive son, Peter. The school that Peter had gone to was holding a competition, and whichever student got the most chocolate bars sold earned themselves a prize. Obviously, Tino didn't think Peter would be able to do this himself, so he thought a party like this would be perfect to sell chocolate.

"U-uh, how many calories do these bars hold?" The Ukrainian, Katyusha Braginskaya asked hesitantly to Tino.

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about it Katyusha!" He smiled his innocent charm, "These chocolate bars are fat-free!"

"R-Really?!" The gullible Ukrainian handed over her money straight away, "Thank you! I'll be sure to buy more!" She walked off with the chocolate bar, and Tino started to silently gloat in his glory until-

"Hey, hey, hey! Willy Wonka!" None other than Vash Zwingli stormed over to Tino's chocolate selling spot, "Selling chocolate at an 'I survived the war' party? Tacky!"

Tino stuttered for a minute, but then came out with a bravely thought up point, "Chocolate is full of antioxidants which make you stronger, which, as we all know, make you more likely to build muscle for, uh, war!"

Vash stared in bewilderment before Tino continued, "So, you could say, that I just saved a life!"

"Yeah, right! The competition is between Lili and Peter; they're supposed to be doing the selling, not the adults!" He groaned and jabbed Tino in the chest with his finger.

Before the bickering could continue, Feliks Łukasiewicz appeared out of seemingly nowhere, "Vash! Speedo season is like a month away and you had the NERVE to sell this to my husband?!"

He brought out a chocolate bar, which had the exact same resemblance to the chocolate that Tino had sold just prior to confrontation.

As he shoved it back into Vash's hands, Tino glared a very accusatory look at Vash.

"Hm?" He asked, expecting an answer.

Vash looked Tino up and down and turned away quickly, walking off with the very small amount of pride he still had left.

* * *

On the other side of the room, Ludwig was standing with the woman who Antonio introduced him to.

"So, Feliciana, what's your job?" He asked, being polite and trying to strike up conversation.

"Oh, I cook pasta at my grandpa's restaurant! It's a very fun job, I love talking to all the customers!" She chirped happily, her eyes seemingly forever shut.

Ludwig laughed slightly, and Feliciana continued, "Besides, I have to work for my grandpa! The pay might not be good, but I love any opportunity I can get to pour pasta sauce on Lovina's head when she gets annoying!"

He chuckled again, and her smile brightened, "Handsome, and laughs at my jokes! Two more cocktails and I may want to marry you!"

Suddenly, Gilbert interrupted very abruptly, "Hi, sorry to interrupt… Can I talk to you for a minute, Ludwig?"

Without waiting for a response, he grabbed his wrist and started dragging him off, "Will you excuse me, Feliciana?..."

"And he looked exactly like you, Feliks." Natalia explained, with a very creepy look on her face, Alfred facepalmed and sighed.

Feliks looked pretty horrified at the story he had just been told, "U-uh, and like, w-why are you telling me this? ..."

"Well, Feliks. You could be that guy. It could happen to you anyday!"

Natalia froze and spotted her prey in sight, "BROOOOOTHHHERRRRR!~" She screamed and ran over to none other than Ivan Braginski. He looked terrified at the sight of her and ducked, making Natalia smash into the wall.

"Aw, damnit, they're gonna break my house! I gotta think of something to shut 'em all up, Feliks!" Alfred whined, and Feliks watched in bemusement.

"Why? This is like, totally Class A entertainment, hon!"

* * *

"Look, its one thing to hide our relationship, but it's another to flirt with a chick right in front of my face!" Gilbert pointed a finger at Ludwig, "What the hell is your problem?!"

The outside air send a chill up Ludwig's spine, and the decking beneath them was hollow, so their footsteps could be heard from a few meters away.

"U-uh! I wasn't flirting! Sh-she was flirting with me!" Ludwig protested, with a small blush on his face at the predicament.

Gilbert pouted, "I saw your face. You were enjoying it…" He looked away shyly.

"U-uh, okay! Listen to me…"

* * *

"T-testing! One, two, three! Testing!" Yao's voice boomed through the room, and everyone looked over, quietening down while the chaos stopped. He looked at the microphone in a confused manner and tapped it, causing the speakers to send out a few thuds.

"Give me that!" Arthur snatched the microphone off of Yao and took it into his own hands, "Alright, I just want to thank everyone for coming, and to say to Alfred, try to throw a better party next time you have a 'I survived war' party."

Alfred snatched the phone off of Arthur, "Ahaha! He's just jealous that he didn't get a cool military outfit! Anywho, thanks everybody! And I just wanna thank the 'big guy upstairs' for looking out for me!" He got a few groans and sighs at that comment, not everyone was religious.

"Now, I'd like us all too just like, take a moment of silence for those soldiers that didn't make it back home…"

Everyone stood still and looked down at their glasses, and silence filled the room. A few hugged the nearest person to them, while others were thinking of ways to pass the minute without talking.

Footsteps could be heard outside and voices started to get louder.

"… ell come on Ludwig, do you love me or not?" Outside the window stood Gilbert and Ludwig, looking at each other, obviously not noticing the presences behind the window.

"I don't know!" He admitted, "Just because I enjoy having sex with you, it doesn't mean its incest!"

As if on cue, cricket sounds were heard and Gilbert and Ludwig finally realized they weren't alone. Gilbert looked towards the window first, with Ludwig turning his head afterwards. They both stared in shock at the faces behind the window.

Almost every person in the neighbourhood stood, along with a few others, staring in shock at the scene in front of them.

Ludwig turned bright red, and Gilbert looked away.

"So, can this be an 'I survived incest' party too?" Alfred piped up.

Everyone face palmed.

* * *

_**Alright, I got bored and based this off a scene I had rewatched today. If anyone can guess what this 'party' is loosely based off, and from which TV series, then I give you a thumbs up!**_

_**I may do a sequel to this chapter, depending on how many reviews I get, and if I get any motivation.**_


End file.
